Me being a judgmental prick for 10 minutes.
I was in a large city (no, I am not going to tell you which one it is) and it was about 8:09 am. It was gloomy and rainy and the energy in the air just reeked of depression.
I looked out of the metro and I saw someone looking absolutely disheveled. He had shoulder-length wavy dark hair that had clearly not been brushed for at least 2 days. He was just in his 30's but he looked tired, gloomy, old. I saw him entering a weed store and I thought to myself that he lacks discipline, drive to make his life better. He could be so much better, I thought. He could be handsome, cheerful and inviting! Instead, he looks spent and depressed.
But then I realized that I am not actually judging him. I am judging myself. In many ways, I am him and he is me. I am depressed. My room is a mess and I do not do chores except for when I need to. I do not have an actual schedule or function like an actual adult. I do not do what I need to do. I do not fight my depression, but I need to fight it because I cannot stay like this.
I need to lock in.